Huh! I did it again. Avoided my problems. I lied to myself. False happiness in attempt to find comfort. The last post. A sigh.
I talk about my pains, then I feel the need to deny it all with comments such as “I am okay” or “I can do it”.
~A cruel gift. The trojan horse. Wonderful~
In reality, I would never have mentioned such pains to those I cherish and love.
I fear the choice and power I have.
To be closer with those I love I chose to give them knowledge of my own sufferings and in turn the amount of stress and worry was a ‘pleasant surprise’.
Then again, I guess they might not mind… we are friends.