moving on.

Unsettled by nightmares, creaking of the wooden floor, howling of the wind, distorted traffic noises and the seemingly eerie silence of my family; I stay still covered under my bunny blanket whilst my own limbs wrapped around a body pillow in attempt to find comfort in warmth.

In these moments, I eventually turn to dreams and fantasies to distract me from my fears. Also, to be frank, most involve J. and sometimes begins with a simple walk in the city to a fated meeting, others involves love surfacing after a long period of time as either, enemies (Romeo and Juliet), childhood friends, friend’s friend, best-friend’s friend, boyfriend’s friend, etc. At times, themes of the supernatural or anime/manga-related comes into play, such as being born with the power of foresight or living life as an angel without wings. Well, I believe I can conclude that I am still a child at heart and my dreams are quite… obscure and way too embarrassing to truly admit in person?

Although, recently, it has been strangely difficult to dream such dreams. Is it because of stress, school, thoughts of the future, concerning my friends’ welfare or that of my cousin’s, due to her late mother… Bless her. Either way, I eventually chose to rely on the light of my mobile phone (haha) and the Bible to console my anxiety and worries. It worked, in the end. I fell asleep. Though, all that fear and stress cause a bad night sleep.

*sigh*

I hope to have better dreams when I retire soon.